worn & aged

was so buzy with work that i’ve momentarily forgotten about this site. but it became a regular habit, so here i am again blogging about nothing…

it’s a crazy crazy week…. yesterday was a really bad day for me, it’s the start of the week and my gosh! i can’t believe somebody took away or maybe stole my headset. of all things to steal, why does it have to be my headset?!!! arghhhhh

so i ended up not doing anything seriously, of course i need to focus on work but how can i stay focused when i am not listening to my daily dose of musik. and this new guard stationed at the server area kept lurking behind our backs. uhm excuse me, but aren’t you paid to watch the server room? why are you always checking our screens? i am very tempted to ask him that, he has this nosey look in him, while we were having a meeting at the pantry area, he kept glancing in our direction, one false move and i’m gonna shoot you guard! but then i realized that he’s not worth it, so i told nanding about him, and he told me he’s going to talk to that man in the uniform. i sure hope he listens though, it’s none of his damn biz to check us out, and so far i am not the only one complaining…

so everything’s running smoothly now that elaine & i are splitting the responsibilities between us, since she’s been working in the day shift i got a lot of load lifted off my shoulder. now i can go home early wow! i wish i could though!

tomorrow will be yo’s last day. it’s a shame he’s leaving the company and not being able to reap the harvest of his long lost struggle. i wish him well though. we all want the good life, and what better way to start one than handing in your letter of resig.

on the way home, officemates and i decided to eat near main… our gluttonous nature can’t resist the smell of fried chicken, hmmm how delicious it tasted…. but i still don’t get it, with my healthy appetite, i still looked like a malnourished kid…

i have ran out of things to blog. i mean there’s so much to say & so little time to do the actual thinking & typing stuffs. but of course there are those trivial things that you wish to share with everyone & all the more complicated things be left unsaid. sometimes though you wish to vent all your disappointments, your anger & frustrations in your blog. i mean who would stop you from doing such things when you are totally in control?  it’s freaky but at least you get to express how you really feel without feeling guilty that you may dent on somebody’s pride or something. i know i am not much of an expressive but this blog has helped me deal with my issues. sometimes i know i am hard on people, in the process, i have hurt and caused a lot of pain but what can i do? i cannot just deal with my raw emotions without threading on somebody. there has to be a fall guys somewhere.

it’s been rather a hazy week. everything is not clear & sharp, but i am fine with it. last night, i dunno what to do, i felt really uncomfortable, it’s a nagging feeling that something is very wrong. i went online for a while and chatted with old friends, then i couldn’t take it any longer, i need to release my angst. i saw my beaten shoes & decided to shampoo it. i took more shoes & ended up washing it in the middle of the night. it was the sort of release i was looking for coz as soon as i am done, i felt happy. after that i went online & chatted with dear old friends. i told them what i just did, and they all think it’s weird. i guess by now they should know that i am weird. i do weird stuffs, not most of the time though but sufficient enough to be branded as different.

guess it was a weird night, it’s been like this for the past few days, and if somebody’s not going to stop me, i’m going to be cleaning the entire house in the middle of the night.

it was a spur of the moment decision. after the brainstorming at the parking lot, we all felt hungry. jade had to go back to the office & heaze was not feeling well. so there’s just me, govinda & nicolo. there’s still a lot to discuss but we need to feed our brains, and so we decided to grab a bite. somebody suggested da vinci’s and wow, pizza! pizza! here we come! we must really be hungry, we ordered the mona lisa topped with extra bacon toppings, along with the 1.5L coke. we all ate in a hurry, and in silence, there must have been around 16 slices in all, and still hunger remained. we decided to order another round of pizza, this time the masterpiece! wow, talk about 3 hungry folks! who would have thought that 2 tiny ladies, and 1 skinny gent would consume all those pizzas? i guess one should never underestimate our eating capacities. actually the truth is, we had trouble eating the last 3 slices. until we have 1 slice left, and we are faced with a dilemma whether we leave the last morsel or should we take it home. it’s such a waste to leave it so, we all decided to take it home, while we were waiting for a cab, i told nico to give it to the person sitting near the resto, he was hesitant but i insisted, and we end up arguing again coz he doesn’t want to give it… govs said, we are like a bunch of kids. so to cut the story short, we gave the food and went home. what a night!

88**88**88

we got an email today, felt like an ultimatum, and i don’t like it one bit, but there’s nothing i can do about it. we are to clean our cubes & get rid of our personal belongings. i was surprised coz i only have a few stuffs, the rest are company owned. so i went home carrying a heavier package coz most stuffs i had in the office are either books or magazines. good thing somebody volunteered to carry my pack. i just didn’t understand why we had to clean it out today, we are not due to moved out of the building til march. i dunno maybe they’re being OA about it.

wow, can’t believe it’s monday!

i’ve been practically busy the whole week that i have forgotten about my weekend off. it’s like i never had any days off. Saturday, went shopping with faye, and we brought home some really good finds. chilled out for a bit at bo’s and you know, the devils este angels that we are, we can’t help but noticed some of the “fashion victims”. i vowed not to speak my thoughts aloud, but sometimes, it just comes naturally you know, i mean you blurt out the words, and before you realize it, the damage has been done. but who cares? there’s just us, and we are having a great time.

sunday was so hot, went to church, yep i do go to church. then meet up with cio after & we watched angge’s game at the sports complex. we saw a lot of yummies there, heck why didn’t i watched soccer cup before? then we headed to ayala coz i have a business meeting. when the ball started rolling, there was no way to stop the discussion. it was an eventful evening.

i have never been this excited… i have finally meet the people that has the same drive & interests as me.

yesterday was okay, was planning to go home early coz i was sleepy the whole day. they were all planning to go out & have some fun. i’m not really in the mood for anything but i stayed to watch the it’s a date coz nico asked me to stay for moral support. while killing time, we joined the gang in their videoke stint (some of them are still hoping to be discovered). i was totally out of this world. i’m so engrossed in my own thoughts and nothing could calm me down. puffed a stick, it isn’t me, i know, but sometimes it’s the only thing that can lift me up. it was time to go, so we head back to the office & well, the search started. only a few peeps were watching & the first part was boring. was having a bit fun on the 2nd part, it temporarily jolted me back to the present time. soon after it was over. we all decided to go home, i was dying to go home coz i wanted to sleep so badly. my friend texted me, and want me to come over join them but my thoughts are in my bed, so i opted not to go. i’m still sleepy though but not as bad as it was yesterday, need to load my sleep a bit, if i wanted to last a lifetime.

8<>8<>8<>8<>8

they have this vday lovenotes in the main foyer, where anybody can profess his/her love to that special someone in the office, but without the person knowing who wrote it. funny i got a note. i don’t know who it’s from. it’s sounds so high school oi, i mean we are all adults in here, if anybody is interested, why can’t they just say, hey! i’m interested in you, wanna go out for a ride? but geezzz come to think of it, what if that person is physically challenged? how would you say no without offending the person? well i guess we’ll just have to stick with the notes then. lui told me to pretend, she said, just pretend it’s a note from starfish, hmmm i guess i’d better pretend then…

it’s tragic–life really is unfair.

it’s heart’s day & you get news that your friend is filing for divorce. how cruel can that be?

i have lost precious sleep just thinking about it. i have no appetite hence my not eating breakfast. i kept thinking about the turn of events that led to this drastic decision. how can 2 people, sooo in love and so perfect for each other grew apart? is it because they love each other so much that they are willing to make the ultimate sacrifice? i’m at a lost…

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anyway, happy heart’s day to everyone! hope you got a hot date tonight. if it gets so hot, remember to use ur rubber hehehe

was having dinner in ayala, while lining up at food choices, waiting for my order, i saw an old suitor. i know he saw me first, but since we were in the same aisle, i greeted him. i could feel his eyes shifting, he is very uneasy, it was a good thing i was with marvin.  it gives him time to talk with him rather than me. i dunno why he was so uneasy, maybe because he’s guilty? he stopped talking to me when he got in a relationship, may be he was afraid of my reaction. but i am very happy for him, i wanted him to know that but everytime our paths crosses, he seem to move in another direction. i hope after our encounter everything will be back to normal.

it’s funny how you misses someone…

you spend so much time together, just talking, walking, and sometimes just chilling out.
then that person goes away for a day or two~
you realize that this person has become so much part of your life and it’s like you are struck by a bolt of lightning. then it slowly dawns on you…
you are actually missing this person.

how tragic.

i am feeling lost today… must be the weather… but of course i dunno exactly why. it seems everything is so wrong… i haven’t done anything right in my life….